TATTERED BRITISH EMPIRE QUAKES AS FURIOUS WELSH ISLANDERS DECLARE UDI

Veteran author Ian Skidmore is a staunch believer in equal opportunity … his love-hate relationships with England and Wales are of admirable egality.

Blatant bias he reserves exclusively for pipsqueak bureaucracy, which in English he might describe as ‘codswallop’ but in Welsh as ‘lol’, coincidentally reflecting in lower-case internet upper-case LOL, newspeak for ‘Laugh Out Loud’.

And Laugh Out Loud is what his newly released BeWrite Books e-novel Island Fling is all about … sheer, rolllocking hilarity from start to fin, as Welsh islanders – in Celtic high dudgeon – cheekily challenge the might of Great Britain in an all out bid for uncompromising independence (a state which Skidmore personally enjoys and used in countless millions of words to keep readers and radio show fans in thoughts and chuckles for several decades).

In Westminster, more than tea is stirred when Daffyd takes a fling with his sling at Goliath and the ‘cachu’ (use your imagination or a Welsh-English dictionary) hits the fan. But that serves ’em right. Let them sue!

(WARNING: To avoid the attention of men in white coats, it is recommended that Island Fling not be read in waiting rooms at dentists’ or psychotherapists’ clinics. Also, for the tranquility of mind of others, please to not attempt to read Island Fling in crowded buses or in first class commuter rail carriages. Turbulence in planes can be reduced by application of duct tape over the mouth. Reading in the street could cause collapse and subsequent trip-over injury to other pedestrians. BeWrite Books’ insurance does not cover the consequences of irresponsible reading.)

So here’s what the cover notes tell us of Island Fling:

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Touchy people are lords of Welsh manors – and Huw ap Gryffydd is the touchiest of all. For him, it’s not the last straw that breaks the camel’s back, but the first.

So when the Her Majesty’s Royal Mail has the effrontery to replace the names of the tiny but proud and ancient Welsh islands of Yns Becod and Yns Tad with mere postal zip codes, enough is enough, already.

And before the hapless British Prime Minister can even make any gargling attempt to say, ‘Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch,’ ap Gryffydd whips his 2,000 colourful islanders into a Celtic frenzy.

They make a Unilateral Declaration of Independence from the mainland and vow to stand, man, woman, child and Druid against any threat to their autonomy.

Centuries earlier the Romans sensed the power and peril of the wrath of the sleeping Welsh dragon, trembled in their togas, and left well enough alone. But those in Westminster’s corridors of power are too cocky for their own good, and rather than just go home for a nice cup of tea and a lie down as Caesar did, they lay plans to force the rebel islands back into line ... and abysmally underestimate what’s in store for their task force across a short stretch of sea.

Can Squire Huw and his makeshift defence brigade of wily Welsh defeat the might of the English so that the British become two islands short of being Great Britain ever again?

Skidmore’s Island Fling rolls swiftly from giggles to laughs to side-splitting hilarity as the Islanders lay their peculiar plans ... and those at Number Ten Downing Street, London desperately try every trick in the book (and some that aren’t in the book) to recapture the two little dots on their map, save face and keep upper lips stiff.

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Author Ian Skidmore

One of Britain’s last great eccentrics, author Ian Skidmore has thirty books under his impressively lengthy belt – many of them best-sellers. He was also one of the most widely-read newspaper columnists and radio show presenters in the UK. After thirty years with BBC Wales, he was awarded by them the coveted Golden Microphone Award … and then fired a month later when BBC bureaucrats discovered he was English!

Ian Skidmore is a talent to rival Tom Sharpe. The funniest writer in Wales: Liverpool Daily Post. Hard act to follow: Wales on Sunday. Great eccentric: Western Mail. Hilarious: Anthony Hose, Director of Buxton, Beaumaris, Llandudno Festivals. Witty and erudite: Joe D Hendry, President of The Library Association. Witty and engaging. Tony Lewis Wales Tourist Board.

Skidmore’s sequel to Island Fling, The Magnificent Evan, will be released by BeWrite Books this summer. His outrageously funny Forgive us Our Press Passes about his days in newspapers is already available from BeWrite Books in OUR BOKSHOP SECTION HERE and all other major online bookstores. 

Over the coming months, BeWrite Books will be re-publishing much of Skidmore’s now out-of-print novels … and all new work, freshly produced in his NINTH decade of brightening the planet with wit, wisdom and belly laughs will now be exclusively in BeWrite Books ebooks editions. All author royalty he donates directly to charities.

And free mini-book brochures of Island Fling and Forgive Us Our Press Passes – including cover, book notes, author biography and picture, reviews and generous extract are instantly available to read right now HERE and HERE. Be sure to check into the author’s Saturday blog column at Skidmore's Island ... if you dare!

Artist John jensen

Cover art is by another revered and award-wining vet, the famously fun John Jensen, who has illustrated more than seventy books and whose brilliant cartoons – displaying wit, wisdom, art and a healthy dose of irreverence – have appeared in major newspapers and magazines all over the world for more than half a decade. Find out more about the colourful Jensen and check out some of his gallery of giggles at JOHN’S WEBSITE.

Island Fling is now available direct from the BeWrite Books BOOKSTORE, all major online retailers and in all digital formats for all electronic reading platforms from PCs and laptops, through the full range of dedicated ebook-reading devices and tablets to iPods and smart phones.

For those interested in the details ... Author: Ian Skidmore. Cover art: John Jensen. Editor: Neil Marr with invaluable proof-reading assistance in unfamiliar Welsh names and phrases from prolific author and editor Celia Skidmore. Text design, digital editions creation and distribution: Tony Szmuk. Additional input: The BeWrite Books team.

Happy Weekend, folks, and Iechyd da. Neil, Tony, Hugh, Sam et al